I Watch Food Porn and I'm Only Kind of Ashamed About It

I think we've all established by now that when it comes to posting things I'm a liar. "I'll be back tomorrow" "This funny thing happened and I'll tell you about it next time" "I'm going to start posting regularly again." I think by now we've all learned that I'm going to post whenever my heart fancies and anyone who reads is just going to have to suck it up and deal with it. I'll be back, I always am. I say this because obviously I didn't post my update on Monday. You'll get it today so don't you worry your pretty little heads but Monday was a busy day of psych appointments, getting my drain pulled, and some other fun stuff. Before I get to the weight loss portion I have a few minor life updates to provide.

1) As I said I got my drain pulled. Those of you who have never had a drain before consider yourselves lucky because it's a pain in the ass all around. I was so paranoid I was going to accidentally pull it out the entire time I had it in. I was so careful with it, it was sore, showering was done sitting down because I didn't really have a place to put it while standing and using both hands, and my dogs didn't understand why they weren't allowed to cuddle. I went in to get it pulled on Monday and the nurse had my sit back on the nifty doctors table. "Are you ready?" she asked "Not at all" was my answer but she did it anyways and holy fuck. That was not a fun feeling. It cramped and just felt weird. Once I got a look at the amount of tubing that was hidden away inside of me I was kind of mad at myself for being so freaked out that it was going to come out, because there's no way that would have happened.

2) I'm moving back to Iowa a lot sooner than expected. As I said a few posts ago I can finally talk about the fact that I'm getting a divorce. The original plan was to wait until May to go home when the Army shipped us back for his ETS. It seemed cheaper, easier, and we'd just live as roommates like we have been since May. That plan has drastically changed. Kyle went home from leave in October and since he's been back things have been pretty tense between us. He got a new girlfriend while he was back visiting his parents and it sucks listening to him talk to her all the time. I don't think that it's jealousy considering I have some pretty exciting stuff going on in my own romantic life that will be expanded on in a month or so, but I'm really happy with where life is taking me in that direction. I think it's just annoying to hear him talk to this chick and be like that's not at all who or how you are bro what the hell. When I got my surgery he spent maybe 30 minutes total the four days I was admitted at the hospital with me and it was pretty much my breaking point. I started thinking about going home in January and then as time has passed I wanted to go home sooner than that. Long story short after a particularly bad night my mother bought me a plane ticket home as a Christmas present and I'll be moving back to Iowa on December 7th. I am beyond excited about this and it makes me feel so much better knowing that I have an end day in sight and it's 26 days away.

3) Because of this I quit my job at Walmart. I feel bad seeing as it's the holidays and I've only worked there for three weeks before taking time off for my surgery, but I wasn't going to get cleared to do the heavy lifting needed for the holiday work and I'm having a tough time getting my fluids in as is so trying to do it while having to run around all day wasn't going to happen. I'm picking up some babysitting shifts between now and then to try to put a little cash away for when I get back home until I'm able to find another job. I'm going to be moving in with my romantic interest (which once you get more of the back story you'll realize isn't totally crazy or moving super fast) and he's going to be taking care of all of the bills and jazz until I'm able to start contributing. I had to fight to be able to contribute once I could because well, this man is amazing. We have a long history and he never fails to make me laugh or smile.

Seriously. Swoon.

Now on to the weight loss part. I haven't really seen the scale move since Monday but I've lost a few inches and I'm definitely seeing a difference! It hasn't been easy. I find myself watching the Tasty and Buzzfeed food videos while my mouth actually fills with drool, and longing for the day when I can take a bite and chew something. I know I'll get to the point again when I can take a bit of food instead of sip it, but that day is not today. I'm having an issue getting all of my protein in because I hate the protein drink that I got, but tomorrow is payday and I'll be going to GNC to find something new when Kyle gets off work. Hopefully I'll be able to find something that tastes better and I won't have such a hard time getting it down. Other than that it's been a lot of sugar free pudding, strained soups, and water. I get cleared to go onto the purred foods next week and I have never been so excited in my entire life for a scrambled egg or mashed potatoes. Anyways, I know you're all dying to see the stats by now so *drum roll please*

I am already seeing a difference! I wasn't at first and was getting a little bummed that I've hit my first stall and then I was getting water from the kitchen and Kyle looked at me and said he could tell I was getting thinner, so obviously I made him take a picture of me so I could do a side by side. I gotta say, I'm pretty pleased. I then measured myself and saw that although I wasn't losing weight I WAS losing inches so woooo.

I'm not going to lie to you and tell you I'll be back on a certain day, but I will be back to update in a week or so. Maybe something will have happened before then to make me post, but we'll see about that. As always I suck at endings and all so....